In
addressing the issue of REJECTION,
we mentioned last week that you shouldn't
let it get to you too much—to
not take it personally. After all,
it's not personal...or is it?
It takes me to a
recent meeting with my own manager
at Principal Financial Group, and
I was sharing with him an account
of a recent "rejection."
Attempting to shake it off, I told
my manager, "It's okay. I know
it's not personal."
"Oh yes it
is! It's very personal!"
he snapped back, clearly not
wanting me to 'shake it off.' He had
cornered me in my own self-deceit.
He was right. Often times, especially
in the financial services industry,
rejection IS personal. How can it
not be, when you are providing
such a personal service?
In a previous issue
of Prospecting Weekly, headlined
"Why
People Buy," I addressed
the primary reasons people engage
in long-term business relationships.
Perhaps the truth is no more evident
than in financial services: likeability
and trust. But keep reading, because
this applies across professions, and
across industries.
"I've observed
two primary phases that must be passed
for a business relationship to nurture
and thus grow," notes Merri Bame,
of BDB
Communication, an executive communication
coach serving clients in both Columbus
and Toledo.
"The first
is attractability,"
she continues. "Each of us must
look in the mirror and ask ourselves,
'Am I attractable? Do I draw people
to me? Am I pleasant to be around?'"
Bame points out that when we are out
networking or sitting down with someone
for the first time, we are, hopefully,
putting the BEST of ourselves out
there—at least when it comes
to a first impression and the potential
to generate rapport.
"If we get
through that phase, then next we have
to build credibility," Bame
says. "Most often, this takes
more time. It is also riskier, because
we must reveal more of ourselves—our
full selves if you will.
And that is where all of us are vulnerable."
So, what avoiding
rejection ultimately comes down
to is, as we have pointed out before,
likeability and trustworthiness.
The Value of Trust
Not too long ago,
a Columbus, Ohio financial services
firm conducted a study of two hundred
clients with excess capital of at
least one million dollars to invest.
They were asked
to identify the most important characteristics
that they would seek in an investment
representative, and to prioritize
them in the order of importance, from
the top down.
Trustworthiness,
honesty and integrity were at the
top! At the bottom (while
still important) were professional
competence. High net worth clients
felt that the return OF their money
trumped the "rate of return"
ON their money.
So does this mean
that when someone rejects you, they
are saying they do not trust you?
Well, not always.
Perhaps they are
simply stating that they trust someone
else more. But trust is
the element that lubricates the sales
process.
But while trust
can shorten a sales cycle on a transaction,
it can take a while to develop. Getting
back to Bame's point: it takes time.
It takes opening yourself up. It takes
risk of making yourself vulnerable.
Are you prepared?
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